So last week was absolutely insane. Seriously. Life was just really complicated and busy and stressful. But it also made me come to terms with a lot of stuff. So it was good.
Last week I seriously had SOMETHING going every single night. Lots of fun. But insane. Plus I had a paper to do and a bunch of books to read. And I've got more books to read this week. Yeah this semester could seriously kick my butt. Hopefully it won't.
I have a phone interview next Wednesday. Internship. We'll see what happens. Still hoping for that full time job. Still applying. Nothing yet.
Mom's shop moved! That's really exciting for our family - Looking Glass Designs is now at 1917 Park Ave, in between The Chocolate Bar and Park Ave. Coffee. Everyone should come and check it out!
I don't know I've just been contemplating a lot. Realizing that the plan that I see for my life (married, fulfilling job I love) and have always thought of as "God's plan" for me may actually not be that. I may never find that "soul mate" or other half, or I might think I find him and it doesn't work out, or heck, I may find him and the relationship is just not "perfect" like I think it will be - in fact I know that won't happen, cause no relationship is ever perfect. I can't keep thinking that the images of my perfect future life I picture in my head are anything but my own twisted mind coming up with them, because when they don't turn out the way I picture I get angry, and that's not right (example - I pictured how Natchez was gonna be. It wasn't exactly like that. I was really disappointed and upset the first few weeks. I can't keep doing that). Look, I may end up single. I may never find that perfect job that I love so much, it may just be a job that I do and am OK with. And I have to be OK with that. I'm not giving up on these ideas of what I want. But I can't let them control me or inspire so much fear in me that they take over my life. And I can't let what others think of me or the fact that I'm not in control of something twist me around either. I'm just finally realizing some stuff and learning to handle them. I'm also starting to learn more about faith. I won't go into all this on here cause it's pretty personal and I don't want to make anyone uncomfortable here. But I just feel like maybe for the first time I get what it's about. And I'm working on connecting that with the things I've messed up and how to deal with it all.
Oh and my exit project (writing the children's book for Campbell House) is getting presented to the executive committee of the board tomorrow. Keep your fingers crossed/be praying for this to get approved. Cause I'm in trouble if it's not. But the director and myself both think it'll be fine. Speaking of the project, I've met the illustrator and she's AWESOME. We're on the same page on the project. I think we'll get along great!
And in other news THE SAINTS WON THE SUPER BOWL! I was pretty happy about that, cause I love New Orleans. Sorry Colts fans. WHO DAT!
Alright that's enough deep thoughts from me. So how are you?
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I could tell you the whole "it's the journey" and all that. I could tell you that only you can make yourself truly happy. I could even tell you that the world's supposed to end in 2 years so it's all moot anyway. But I'm not. Bottom line: you're amazing, brilliant, and fun. And did I mention gorgeous? Things will work out exactly as they're supposed to, exactly when they're supposed to, but in the mean time, we're going to have a blast :)
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